Parcheesy 12 signs letter of intent with capps college of cosmotology

Shickasaw, Al
To say national signing day is huge would be like calling the Hindenburg a balloon. Today was a big day in Alabama college athletics for fans of both Auburn and Bama, but it was a press conference held in the VFW on West Lee street that had the state buzzing.

Mrs. Clem and Boogie Johnson were up and warming up the Chevy wagon before the sun broke. "Boogie was so excited last night that one of our local boys was gonna make good for himself, he couldn't even eat" said Clem. In fact Mrs. Clem said Boogie actually cut his fingernails and dug out his dress pair of Velcro Pumas last night. It was a similar scene up and down this sleepy country town as locals anticipated the biggest local event since FEMA checks arrived.

As the Farmers Federation high school athlete of the year and 3 time Huddle House Senior leader entered the front room of the VFW, Slim Jims and beef jerky were quickly hidden inside shirt pockets and purses. I believe the mayor even swallowed his plug of Beach Nut. The tension and anticipation was thicker than southern sweet tea.

Parcheesy 12 stepped to the folding table and took a seat.
"I would like to thank everyone for coming out today as I make my announcement to play some ball on the college level" Parcheesy said with a slight nervous tone. After a few sips of coke he continued; " I would like to thank my meemaw, my diddy, my cousin 16 ounce, my center cellophane, my uncle Boogie and aunt Clem, Mrs. Walvis and Mrs Joann at the fillin' station and my girlfriend Pawn Shop Sherry". After a long pause and some tears of joy, Parcheesy continued. "I have decided to play some ball for Capps school of welding and cosmetology".

The crowd cheered and screamed and even spoke in tongues as the announcement was made. Old man Larry even began to perform an impromptu country jug dance on his chair. Once the excitement settled, everyone proceeded to the Rock of Redemption Tabernacle Church for a pot luck dinner. This reporter is filling this story with a belly full of chocolate covered pork rinds, jello and boiled eggs.

When asked what plans he had after college, Parcheesy said he hopes to open up the first hair salon/oil change center in Shickasaw. "You just don't see people with my kind of follicle density and knowledge of combustible engines in a town like Shickasaw" said the all star place kicker.