I really get excited when the new lagniappe hits those hideous pink boxes around the old waterfront. Let me say up front, I think it is the best publication we have had in the port city. I like the fact that they pis off the mayor on occasion and I do enjoy the humor. I also have to say, up front, that they have gotten "not as original" as they once touted themselves to be. They have also began to lean more towards a bar an eatery rag. All that being said.....I like the pub.
Well everything except the Nappie awards. It is the Wikipedia first paragraph on why Mobile is a poser....a wanker....a fat bitch at maradi grad.....a Bleach blond chubby hiding behind a spray tan....a local Mobile artist selling cheap phrases on cheap ply-wood from Lowes. The winners are ridiculous and why Mobile is such a fake city...a wanna-be cultural center. Wake up people.....stop voting for places just because you recognize the name and your redneck friends on Facebook post up sloppy pics from there every weekend. It just kills me that people even go to the Dew Drop Inn for lunch. It is a Winn Dixie dog in a stale ass Bunny bread blanket. You just go there because it is "cool" and makes you more MIMO. red alert MIMO ain't that cool. I just shake my head at this years winners and wonder if people in Mobile are just stupid or just want to be fake. Hey loom at us in a whimsical funky place with a big city name above the door. Just a side thought.....funky, eclectic and whimsical are all just ways of saying we have no real talent.
Let's just take a look at this years winners.
Best outdoor dining....Bluegill....really, paper plates and West Nile are cool these days.
Best beach restaurant....Lulus.....just because it is Jimmy B. sister does not require you to like cheap food at bloated prices.
Best ice.....that is actually a category....is this a third world country?
Best grocery store....Mac Dixie....yea if you want to be begged for a quarter or stuck in a freezer during a thug holdup.
Best pizza...mellow mushroom....just because the servers have skin soars, are high off the bong and their dread dust makes your allergies go crazy does not mean you are young and back in college. Get out more...the pizza is not that good.
Fav radio station...the Zew....name me the next song that plays...stop trying to be cool!!!!
Bet news anchor....Mel showers....really. Are you 80 years old!! You drink at Callaghans but watch Mel!
Sexiest news gal.....chasity Byrd....put down the beer goggles and stop wearing Izod at Boo Radleys
Funny how people are so tired of Steve "The Hammer"Nodine, but Hallie Dixon is the hardest working politician....what the Hell has she done to help Mobile....oh wait I think I saw her on the kayak with Wolf Dog picking up trash from our water.
I dare not even begin a rant on Namans Catering....
Best ESHO restaurant...California Dreaming....do you people even drive more than 2 miles past the exit ramp?
Anyway...I could go on forever ......can we just stop trying to be Facebook cool and start thinking with some sense. Take off the clear hooker pumps and stop following the crowd.